when i do A for long enough and my overall net worth comes close enough to zero, i switch to B and am only sometimes capable of wrangling it in

it seems impossible to actually have a balance - those two philosophies make the most sense (trying hard vs nothing matters)

whyyyy. furthermore, are there any good ways to manage this that aren’t sort of self-flagellating or overly concerned with minutia (ie like the YNAB thing). no cult stuff pls

  • mapiki@lemm.eeEnglish
    2·
    11 months ago

    I like everyone’s answers here.

    1a. Definitely take at least some consideration of what your mental health looks like over those periods. It could be a symptom. (Not that you won’t sadly still need coping strategies regardless. Mental health issues just suck.)

    1b. Do you have a career where there are seasonal variations in workload? Are coworkers or family or friends potentially influencing your spending behavior?

    1. You’ve already heard of YNAB. (And it’s like only 10% a cult? 😂) I think it could be a useful tool for you. Since you seem to hate the minutia keep your categories dirt simple. Debt payments, short term fun, fixed expenses. Break them down only so far as they are useful for YOU. YNAB will get pretty good at guessing categories for you these days.

    2. Consider what you are working towards when you are in a working hard phase. What makes those savings worthwhile? Afterall - money is only a means to an end. I find it easier to save and consider giving up buying that $800 pair of new powder skis I really don’t need if I know it’s to go on an epic honeymoon in a year. Personally and maybe not as easily applicable, I’ve had an issue of saving too much… so I also gave myself the list of goals I was saving for and what timeline I wanted for them and I avoid saving more than I need for those things over that time. (Retirement, wedding, down payment, honeymoon, student loans.) After that set amount… all the money is mine to do what I want with so I can spend it on what makes me happy without guilting over it.

  • whodatdair@lemm.eeEnglish
    1·
    1 year ago

    Have you ever been to therapy? Tbh it sounds more like something psychological that talking to someone about might help more than a trying to find some framework to deal with it.