Time for a new Chinese online girlfriend

“Puerto Rico needs to end it’s vicious trade war against the US or risk it’s government being overthrown and made a US state.”

So many of Moscow’s ‘Red Lines’ have been crossed it’s starting to look like a red carpet.

Jod introduced the idea of freewill to the board.

Lucifer said “That’s a bad idea, chief. Free will would ruin them.”

Jod cast him out.

Humans fucked everything up.

Jod sent his CTO, Jesus to try and fix it. It went poorly.

Lucifer said " I told you so"

Call the John Deere pirates, they know how to deal with this

Wizzo: “Splash one Tango, target exploded.”

Pilot: “I didn’t send the missile yet, the car just did that.”

Thank you for your sacrifice.

Sincerely,

An egged-up Australian

What will I eat with my bacon?!

Who doesn’t know what a trans person is?

Saddam meme too.

What are you gonna make?

You can ever say cunt

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jail

Pretend you have no concept of electric cars.

“Diesel or gas? Where do you fill it up? Yeah I know how electric cars work, don’t treat me like an idiot. I’m asking where does the fuel go?”

Channel your inner grandpa when being shown the touchscreen. Firmly stab and hold your finger on the screen when pushing buttons. I’m told they don’t have parking brakes, so insist to be shown where the park brake is.

Ask how many miles to the gallon. Haggle endlessly. Make them show you the engine.

They went to the fighter store and all the F-35s were turned upside down.

The robots have learned of quiet quitting

Australia actually has a fairly robust naval shipbuilding industry in Adelaide, and an established armoured vehicle industry in the east, building bushmasters and Hawkies.

A fair amount of drones and counter-drone systems too.

Oppenheimer.

3 hrs of nausea-inducing quick cuts

Sometimes I worry they are being purposely dense because they want to spend more time with us.