We’re gonna need more bagels and cream cheese…

I haven’t been this shocked since I found out the original McGruff voice actor was arrested with a bunch of guns and weed plants

I had a truck without a working stereo so I just used some Bluetooth speakers

I imagine giant sloths as Ent-like, moving through the trees slowly, smelling this, eating that, not really worrying until there’s a weird little monkey with a stick with a rock on it.

They used to, but it didn’t boost ad engagement so they stopped.

Free trimming.

Counterpoint: create a field of brambles for your goats to wander through when they get itchy so you don’t have to brush them.

Bonus: those brambles are blackberry bushes so you can wander through them and eat breakfast.

And gather goat fur to spin into cordage or make brushes from.

I hope the IT guys who set it up kept their work orders.

If your boss orders you to do something stupid, you get that shit in writing

What are the odds this is just Clinton’s $5,000 Baby Bond, which was just giving them a fund at birth that they can cash out when they turn 18?

Except this time there’s no guardrails and he can give it to all his cryptobro friends.

Wow she really isn’t very good.

How were we so starved for something that we latched onto her baloney?

I think it sounds like a way to give a bunch of money to Wall Street so they can gamble with it

We can’t teach our kids media literacy or they’ll stop believing our propaganda

It’s really gonna help to pay for diapers in an index fund.

Thanks

Everyone is stupid except for me

FTFY

Yes the Trump is made of Trump

Be around fewer people.

Unless I’m paying for $1600 audio cables my noise-damaged ears can’t tell the difference and I like that I don’t rip things out of them.

Obligatory:

I blame Macklemore