There’s a method, gents. Push the gooch a few times while using your “stop peeing” muscle. Then, pinch the shaft, applying pressure from the underside. Starting from the base, bring your fingers forward up the shaft towards the tip until you get those last few drops. It’s clumsy at first, but you build a routine and the drip drip is a thing of the past.
Women who try this: you’re just going to end up with your fingers in your vajayjay, not that I discourage that.
There’s a faux Christian saying: “If you shake it more that three times, that’s masturbation.”
What if I can bust without touching it? Does God just congratulate me for the skill?
Had that happen once (I’m a very needy guy, mmmk?). But I’m satanic so I’ll let you know when I pick up my penthouse suite from the man himself. Probably throw you a party and bring a dozen guys in to blow you proper until you faint, I guess. No basic-bitch ‘congratulations’ here. We go all out.
Something about this comment and the way it was written has given me the vague feeling of a deep and interesting story in which you’re playing a part. There’s an air of mystery to it but a promise of a good time. 10/10 comment.
There are far more effective techniques out there. Please see this research paper by a top-tier scientist:
https://garry.net/posts/piss-shake
Or it might instead be a blog post by a video game developer, I don’t really understand the difference.
Tldr Jack it.
Or just, you, sit down to pee where it will all come out anyways.
We stand up when we pee! Boo this man!!
BOO!
Do you mean gooch? Chode is a penis that is girthier than it is long
Welcome to your 40s
Hey, I’m not even 37.
Our generation has aged a hell of a lot quicker than others, I blame MTV.
Just walk on the spot while shaking your fella, works for me, tricks the little prick into thinking I’ve walked off.
You gotta switch back to retention mode and relax before storage. There’s a little bit of lag when the valve ages.
When you finish tinkling, just give the bit between the plums and the starfish a little poke to get the last few drops out.
You’re welcome.
I keep hearing this but can’t seem to get it to work :(
Whats the starfish
You need to bring a starfish from the beach when you go
Listen… If you don’t hear back from me, thanks for the life changing advice.
Seriously… However awkward it is to talk about, it worked so well I told my coworkers lol
Taint?
The gooch
Good ole Chode
Put them back on? Don’t you mean pull them back up?
What exactly is going on here?
You have to take them off, if you want to sit backwards and rest your phone on the tank
Paprika asking the spicy questions we didn’t know we needed the answers to!
gotta squeeze the grundle
It’s most likely to happen when I’m wearing pants that are light enough to really show through. If my pants are dark and will hide it, my dick probably works twice as well that day.
No matter how much you shake and dance,
The last few drops end up in your pants.
-Shakespeare, probably
Yall don’t do the dick flex thing to get the last stream out?
Oh fuck. This is lemmy watch out.
Someone is going to say this is a sign you need to turn into a woman. You’ll be called an egg in no time.
He had slayed me, mutha! [Deathdrops.