Y'all@theATL.social
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • Create Community
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 年前

Stuck

lemmy.world

message-square
67
link
fedilink
750

Stuck

lemmy.world

ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 年前
message-square
67
link
fedilink
alert-triangle
You must log in or # to comment.
  • tourist@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    206
    ·
    1 年前

    They didn’t have any abbreviations ready for that sentence

    • TheOrcWhoWrites@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      79
      ·
      1 年前

      “So, what code do we put in for the insurance company?”

      • piefood@piefed.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        188
        ·
        1 年前

        8=%=D

        • Anarki_@lemmy.blahaj.zone
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          41
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          🏅

          • TheOrcWhoWrites@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            8
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            1 年前

            Definitely awarded

        • Empricorn@feddit.nl
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          11
          ·
          1 年前

          Amazing.

        • Wilco@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          1 年前

          This explains everything in 5 characters.

        • Slovene@feddit.nl
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          8%D FTFY

      • Gork@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        31
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 年前

        42069

      • expatriado@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        8
        ·
        1 年前

        4011

        • TheOrcWhoWrites@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          1 年前

          Is 4011 something real? Or am I missing something?

      • MsPenguinette@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        1 年前

        00003

    • BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      40
      ·
      1 年前

      If the chief complaint is funny/fucked up enough, we won’t abbreviate it

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      27
      ·
      1 年前

      FGT SPNR STK ON PNS

  • someguy3@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    59
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    9‽

    • Tar_Alcaran@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      52
      ·
      1 年前

      I don’t have a penis, but I for one was a total idiot at age 9.

      • AbsentBird@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        18
        ·
        1 年前

        Not having a penis: the perfect counter to the fidgit spinner trap

    • UltraMasculine@sopuli.xyz
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      41
      ·
      edit-2
      5 个月前

      deleted by creator

      • jaybone@lemmy.zip
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        16
        ·
        1 年前

        Check out Mr. Popular over here with his social life.

    • BakerBagel@midwest.social
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      36
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      Boys start playing with their weiners as soon as their hands can start grasping stuff. It’s instinctual.

      • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        8
        ·
        1 年前

        It’s instinctual in that all babies explore their genitals as soon as they can start willfully moving their hands, yes. It’s not just boys having a special connection to their genitalia.

        • DUMBASS@leminal.space
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          18
          ·
          1 年前

          Yeah, but we make it our personality!

          • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            7
            ·
            1 年前

            Username checks out lmao

            • DUMBASS@leminal.space
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              3
              ·
              1 年前

              Nawww you miss your opportunity to call someone a dumbass and get away with it… dumbass.

        • Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          11 个月前

          tbf a dick is way more fun to literally play with, like they’re so inherently comedic that all cultures agree that drawing a dick is funny

          • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            11 个月前

            If you don’t think the same of a vulva, then you’re only outing yourself as having incredibly little imagination/experience with them. CIA couldn’t have gotten that out of me, honestly.

    • tomi000@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      33
      ·
      1 年前

      I dont think 15yo penises fit into fidget spinners, but Im not an expert on child genitalia.

      • ZeffSyde@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        71
        ·
        1 年前

        I’ll ask my priest.

      • JasonDJ@lemmy.zip
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        20
        ·
        1 年前

        It really depends on both the size of the fidget spinner and the will of the child.

      • dutchkimble@lemy.lol
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        1 年前

        You misunderstand. It’s a 9yo fidget spinner.

    • Dozzi92@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      28
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      My wife texted me the other day:

      You know that yellow slide our son carries around? Well, he started sticking his penis in it, you have to talk to him now.

      He’s 4. It’s just what boys do.

      • GoodLuckToFriends@lemmy.today
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        16
        ·
        1 年前

        Yeah, children play with their genitals far more than I ever wanted to believe. I don’t really remember doing it as a kid, but it wouldn’t surprise me if most parents, including mine, have stories about the odd things that happen.

      • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        1 年前

        Not just boys. Girls explore and test boundaries with their genitals too.

        • Dozzi92@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          4
          ·
          1 年前

          Have a daughter also, so I know it all too well! Our focus is “It’s normal but private.” We will see how that goes.

          • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            1 年前

            That’s gonna be our approach, too with our kiddo.

            It’s a hard one to fight your own overly-conservative programming in order to teach a healthier outlook to your kids. Hard to know if you’re going too far one way or the other. So much of parenting you just don’t know if you’re doing it right until you’re done.

            Fist-bump from one internet parent to another, you’re doing a great job ✌️

        • andros_rex@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          1 年前

          Electric toothbrushes….

          • iheartneopets@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            1 年前

            Never used one of those, but showerheads and bath faucets certainly

    • DUMBASS@leminal.space
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      1 年前

      You gotta start somewhere.

    • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      1 年前

      I was jerking off around that age, hadn’t ever seen any porn or anything, no need to call child protection, it was just natural for me

    • MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      1 年前

      I wonder how my life would have changed if i had access to the internet at age 9

  • expatriado@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    32
    ·
    1 年前

    15 mins at the swimming pool is cheaper than ER

    • assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      He might need to have his penis drained to get it out.

      • Fuck u/spez@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        1 年前

        Usually I get mine out before I drain it.

  • toofpic@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    25
    ·
    1 年前

    The ultimate Helicopter Dick.

  • SassyRamen@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    23
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    Right foot penis, abdomen penis, back penis, fidgit spinner… still spinning!

  • PapstJL4U@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    1 年前

    That’s why you explain what the helicopter really is…

  • dechnically@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    1 年前

    he’s literally me

  • HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    1 年前

    Directions unclear

  • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    10
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    1 年前

    I’ve seen some different sizes of fidget spinners, but no way is anyone that small lol

    • Omega@discuss.online
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      24
      ·
      1 年前

      it’s a 9 year old

      • Zidane@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        1 年前

        We all know boys don’t grow dick and balls until puberty

      • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.comBanned from community
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        1 年前

        I mean, as someone who was once 9 (and I’m not lacking but I’m not that gifted either), still idk about this. They used skateboard bearings, like bones reds but cheaper (if you wanna make that shit fly, throw some swiss ceramics in there). I never fidget spun because I’m old but I skated so I recognized them instantly. Maybe if the bearing was popped out, but no way anyone fits in a fidget spinner with the bearing in.

        That axle hole is 8mm, the external diameter is still only 22mm, but maybe, if the wiener in question can squish down to roughly 23mm. Still hard to believe. Reds pictured for reference.

        3621

        • jaybone@lemmy.zip
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          4
          ·
          1 年前

          I’d guess if you were 9 years old and super flaccid you could kind of mush it through there.

          • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.comBanned from community
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            arrow-down
            2
            ·
            1 年前

            Well not me, and again I’m not exactly a porn star over here, I’m literally just above average for my demographics, statistically. Maybe a micro?

      • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        1 年前

        Absolutely not. A baby penis could MAYBE fit in a skateboard bearing. Probably not even then. That’s ridiculous.

        • psychOdelic she/her@discuss.tchncs.de
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          how do you know?

    • Carl@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      1 年前

      https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/zdv5gv/how_would_you_get_a_small_cylinder_51in_length/

  • TootSweet@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    8
    ·
    1 年前

    Fwizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    • GoodLuckToFriends@lemmy.today
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      1 年前

      I would have to wonder if there were any nurses/doctors that found themselves spinning a fidget spinner later that day. Maybe they knew where it came from… maybe they didn’t.

  • hOrni@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    8
    ·
    1 年前

    Like it didn’t happen to everybody at some point.

  • ImmersiveMatthew@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    1 年前

    Someone did not know that alcohol makes you soft.

    • assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      19
      ·
      1 年前

      Yeah. Lets get the 9yo drunk

      • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        1 年前

        It builds character, dammit!

        • WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          I mean, there’s always small beer.

      • ImmersiveMatthew@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        1 年前

        Ahahaha. Missed that detail, but it could be 19, 29, 39, 49, 59, 69…well maybe not 69+.

  • KingBoo@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    1 年前

    … But how?

    • Nicht BurningTurtle@feddit.org
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      1 年前

      It’s a 9 year old and some spinners have a hole on each side.

      • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        1 年前

        deleted by creator

        • Nicht BurningTurtle@feddit.org
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          1 年前

          Andrew is sadly to small to reach the other side.

Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world

lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful

Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

…


2. No Illegal Content

Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

…


3. No Spam

Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

…


4. No Porn/Explicit

Content


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

…


5. No Enciting Harassment,

Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

…


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

…

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 4.16K users / day
  • 9.48K users / week
  • 15.6K users / month
  • 28.3K users / 6 months
  • 4 local subscribers
  • 38.9K subscribers
  • 24.6K Posts
  • 558K Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • Aer@lemmy.world
  • Striker@lemmy.world
  • WiildFiire@lemmy.world
  • Decoy321@lemmy.world
  • The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website
  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
  • The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world
  • UI: 0.19.17
  • BE: 0.19.13-69-g026371327
  • Modlog
  • Legal
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org